I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not fully consider where I had messed up within my process from considering where I require firstly basing myself under the initial starting point of what is most supportive to first start walking.
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not fully walk the process within this, out of multiple egos that I have accepted and allowed myself to create within and as a way to impede myself. Within that, I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to realize, that, if I go into intense reaction to a point, it means that I require taking a break from the point for a moment, not further reacting, not go into fear and into further resistance or self judgement, and then walking the steps that most support myself logically within what is here, as in terms of what is here to follow what my process shows me, what I'm capable of understanding and applying, and what I'm incapable of understanding and applying.
The following: when and as going into confusion, into intense fears, I stop, I breath, I do not further go into suppression, and I go straight to the point of applying myself back to writting, back to confronting the reactions.
When and as I see myself further reacting and going into fear, regardless of how much I'm breathing while writting, I stop, I breath, and I listen to interviews, I read blogs, I bring myself back to here, back to the point of self application and using what I read, or hear, as a directive point to go back into my process, to starting again and retrying, and building relationships which most support the process, which most support myself within understanding myself and my relationships that I currently start to focus on that are require to be most attended to - eating, writing, cleaning, driving, sleeping, shiting, showering, and physical resistances, how well focused I am when writing, how well am I considering the full context of the circumstances that surround these specific necessities and these points that I practically cannot live without.
I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to thus fully consider the point of where I require eradicating that which compromises my process, and that which compromises the point of understanding my intake with knowledge and information, and applying myself to best support walking through those self limitations to understanding my process, and how to walk my process.
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus not apply myself to the biggest problem that I see that impedes me from my process and the point of walking my process, to where I thus fully recognize the circumstances I can move around to support myself within that starting point of understanding what is most required to take self responsibility for, and to keep onto that biggest point that requires the most possible attention, to where I can equally apply myself to living, apply myself to functioning, feeding my body, showering, cleaning my house, and using a physical support system which I'm most currently capable of equally supporting.
I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus not use the physical, use supporting and assisting myself through what ever I have to in order to not further accumulate reactions, further accumulate future consequences to being bigger than what they already potentially are, if I do not stop within myself here, and take those consequences within myself into consideration to what I have to possibly do in order to bring myself back here.
I forgive myself that I've not accepted and allowed myself to thus see and realize that I'm already walking the point of process, that process is always here with me within supporting myself, but understanding and realizing that I cannot go into fear, into reaction to preconceptions that "might" support my process, when in fact it only feeds the consequences, feeds the accumulation of reactions and further not taking self responsibility here, and applying myself to what's here as a point of understanding where I can possibly function and move within my process.
I commit myself to start focusing on the initial starting point that I had made most apparent to myself when having found the point which I most consistently am able to function other, and to build up from that, and start evolving the principles of equality and what's best for life, around that initial point that I first found as most effective, and basing myself closely around what is most practically effective, and what I can currently function under within what I know most supports me here.
I see and realize that it will require pushing, facing circumstances, and walking through these physical necessities, in order to face myself within where I had separated myself in relationship to these points, in relationship to the fact that I will require focusing on how to become most decisive physically with these relationships, and to also point out all personality relationships which impede my functionality to these relationships, and to build and equal and mutual understanding surrounding these relationships.
I see and realize that whatever point I have separated myself from the physical, from my relationships, that I practically require looking at the consequences in what relationships I participate, and stop any relationships that further feed the foreseen potential consequences IF not directed, by basing myself practically around relationships that will support myself most effectively, keeping myself from relationships that will make it MUCH more difficult if I participate in them, and assuring, that any time I am entering that point of hell, that that is when I know I missed someone, that that is when I was not fully directive, and was following an in directive path, or that I was not willing to let go of an ego that I accepted and allowed myself to relate to that supportive relationship.
Within this, I commit myself to thus finish what I require finishing when facing myself in a point of transcendence, and to stick with that point of transcending until it is done, and to cross reference with the commitment I initially stood by in the beginning of that relationship, and then ending it with full completion, with every spot of physical capability I had within myself that finished the job, and understanding that following breath when I know I'm directly in the point of breath, is as effective as I can walk, and to then to realign myself to a consistent relationship within the step by step process, which requires understanding that process, means MY process, and what best supports myself most consistently to where I don't go into mayhem in the mind.
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