Sunday, November 24, 2013

Day 83 - lazyness part 1


I Forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to be determined with how I move in and as lazyness.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to define myself under lazyness, due to fears of moving throu points within myself, more so than others. Thus win this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to allow expectation of certain points being more convenient than others, to determine when and when I don't have the power to change myself.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to allow lazyness to define me in and as movement, when I become anxious in and as walking through a point, where I will be walking through a point, and then I accepted and allow lazyness to be the outcome of covering up my knowledge/understanding that that point that i walk through, can be walked through as LNG as I applied myself to breathing, and letting go, but instead allowing lazyness to be the immediate prevailed choice when facing points.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus let points Ccumulate regardless of the known consequences, simply because 'I don't feel like breathin' 'I don't feel like walking through breathing and what breathing offers me within my self application within self honesty'.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus be defined by accumulated emotions.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to allow these emotions to guide me as what's real and what's not real, and thus within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to let the awareness of my past depict the outcome of my future, and thus within is, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to allow the point of "I'm a fuck up" determine my living decision to walk through difficult points.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus relate difficulty as 'bigger than me', and thus the bigger meaning I am the inferior, and thus within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to allow my egos functioning be the decision maker of when and when I won't stand. Thus within is, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not realize, that the only way I will become living effective here, is that I build up the strength and courage here physically, to walk through tough shit, to walk through my fears, and not t allow the very foundation of survival be the keeper of my own self destruction, but allowing the physical to flourish myself from the enslavement of fear, and becme life here.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself, to thus through fear, create this predetermined notion within myself and my process, that I MuST stand up, or else I will be punished. Thus, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to not walk through the points I've related in and as my concious mind to my issues internally, but to instead let them settle due t not breathing through to understanding my concious mind manipulation trap to kee myself from standing here as life, thus within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to fear my own mind, instead of understanding it as simply an accepted and allowed system, that doesn't exist, and thus requires time to eradicate through walking through points and wires of myself slowly. Thus within this, I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to consider myself as life under my process, which this life walking through points that always make sure that those points are walked through for myself as life, including all life, but not REALy considering myself as life within this process, but instead as this punished being for hat I have done, and not allowing myself to enjoy myself within the process.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus not allow myself to walk through points that concern self judgement, to give myself a chance to really get to the core problem with the ability to accept mysef as life win why I'm walking through that problem of self judgement.

I forgive myself that I've accepted and allowed myself to thus not investigate the starting point and the aspiration as to why I'm doing why I'm doing - why am I breathing - why am I writting - why am I cleaning. Within this, I commit myself to give myself support through investigAting and studying basic income and equal money, as to build a foundation of practical sense when having to consider personal problems required facing.


Continueing to part 2

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